I hate working out. My body, or “temple,” reflects that disdain by being a pudgy, lumpy, misshapen chunk of lazy. On the other hand, I love video games. The sitting, the pressing of buttons to perform elaborate actions, and snacking in between levels/quests/matches all fit me like a glove (prior to evidence tampering). On the Xbox 360, the two activities were mercilessly combined with Xbox Fitness. The results? Well, let’s just say the Red Ring of Death wasn’t the only killer on the loose at casa de Cooper.
I murdered my Xbox. And that’s not a euphemism for doing well at a particular game. I actually tore the console from its home on my dresser, tossed it across the room and watched in agony as it shattered against my wall. In retrospect, it could have been roid rage.
However, Kinect 2.0 doesn’t share its predecessors demons. While it’s certainly not perfect, there’s a lot less guess-work, and that eases much of the frustration that held its workouts from being anything more than annoying distractions.
Enter Xbox Fitness again, now teaming with P90X’s handsome creator: Tony Horton. For $59.99, the man himself will deliver a 30 day regimen with five exclusive workouts right to your Xbox One; sexy abs that’ll humiliate yours and everything. There’s also a nutrition guide and calendar to look forward to in August, so those concerned about regularly eating their weight-up in carbs can rest easy. Tony doesn’t play games – at least not when it comes to personal fitness.
P90X is tough. I don’t know that from personal experience, but from the looks of the bulging pecks and other borderline-erotic man-parts flashed on TV once network programming hits the hay, I’d say it’s like giving birth from your muscles. Thankfully we have Tony Horton’s guidance. That said, I’ll be giving it a shot. I want to be fit enough to be able to have my back hair removed without feeling like there’s a fingerboarding competition on my spine.
Watch the trailer below: