Cleaning Up Earth’s Unsightly Human Infestation in Planet Bash

The moon and Earth have a complicated relationship.  While it started in violence, the two were close for millions of years before drifting apart.  They’re still important to each other, of course, but the moon only shows one side of itself to Earth, and they’re slowly but surely getting more remote from each other as the endless years drift by.  Like family that still loves each other even if they only barely get along, though, it doesn’t mean the moon is going to sit back and let Earth get covered by humans and the giant spires they build from its surface, and if that means Earth gets a little beaten up in the process then that’s just a bonus.

Planet Bash is an arcade-style game that just released on Early Access today, and in it you get to be a grumpy moon hammering down on the people beneath your orbit.  Humans are building unsightly skyscrapers that completely cover the planet’s surface, with tanks and missiles firing into space to eradicate Earth’s destructive satellite.  Each smack of the moon takes out a good chunk of skyscraper, but it takes several hits to get to the surface and the humans aren’t resting while this happens.  You’ll need to pound quickly but strategically to avoid taking too much damage, dodging meteors, space-mines, and even flying saucers in an endless quest to keep the planet under control.

While the basics are fairly simple, there are a few extra systems ticking away under the hood to add some depth.  Take out several buildings when they reach maximum height for a nice point bonus, keep en eye out for power-ups and coins as they float on by, work the frenzy meter to enter an invulnerable hyperactive rainbow freakout mode, etc.  The current plan is to add more mechanics, enemies, bosses, and even a system where you can destroy the planet if you’re not careful, making mindless bashing more of a hazard.  There are two currencies to earn, coins and a tally of humans destroyed, and between one round and the next you can spend them on new abilities.  Coins go towards enhanced skills such as a more powerful bash, stronger powerups, increased likelihood of frenzy-mode-inducing items, etc, while the kill-count lets you buy hats that both make the moon look cuter than it already is and come with their own set of abilities.

Planet Bash is still a bit on the simple side at the moment, but it’s a fun simple that’s got room to grow.  Leveling the skyscrapers back to ground level is weirdly satisfying, and when you double-tap to put on a burst of speed it almost feels like you’re shaving the planet.  Which is, admitted, fairly weird, but using a 73 sextillion kilogram razor doesn’t even make the top-50 strangest gaming concepts.  Planet Bash is a fast-paced burst of action that’s perfect for when you’ve just got a few minutes and want to break things, and if the Earth gets a bit dinged up in the process it still beats having every square inch of surface developed to within an inch of its life.